Saturday, January 23, 2010

Some times Stephen makes me laugh

Every since the day I met Stephen he has been 100% supportive of me going to school and getting an education. I don't know if he will ever realize how much this means to me. Its difficult to go to school as a single person with no worries, its beyond difficult to do as a single mother or if you have an unsupportive spouse. Having him back me up was one of the main reasons I was able to finish my Associates degree and the only reason I am now working on a Bachelor's degree.

Not long after I met Stephen I found myself making a not so smart deal with my X and living in an old rent house that my X-husband and I had purchased with the idea of completely remodeling it for our children to live in as they went to college. With the divorce came a lot of changed plans and no child support. Because I had signed over every thing I was in this small apartment with no yard and to many collage parties going on, so out of pure desperation I agreed to free rent instead of all the back child support that was owed to me. So me and my girls ended up living in the house before it was really ready. Stephen was amazing, he helped close in the garage, patched the kitchen floor (it was falling in) worked on the sewer and built a wonderful cabinet to hold the fish tank with the left over wood he build me a desk on one complete wall of the closed in garage. This was a huge work space for me and where I studied, paid bills and really spent a lot of my time. Unfortunately the desk was built into the wall and when I moved I had to leave it behind.

There are only two things I miss about that ran down house, one is the enormous fenced in yard with a great storage shed and room for a garden, it was the kind of yard you could let your kids play in all day and not worry about a thing. The other thing is that built in desk, I miss it every day really.

When I moved into our now home, I was so excited to not need a plumber on speed dial, not worry about unsteady floors and to have a place that my X couldn't barge into any time he wanted. Stephen was in the UK while I was moving so it was a bit difficult for me and my kids go do all of it on our own. I resorted to moving a little each day after work. This wasn't the best idea because I got a few essentials moved in, beds for the girls, some of our clothes, the couch, our computers and tv, the amazing cabinet that Stephen build with the fish tank on top and the refrigerator then wham the old house was robbed and we had nothing left to move, just a huge mess to clean up. We had no dishes, not all of our clothes, I didn't have a bed here yet, no desk no tables nothing. At the time I only had a couple of classes left so getting a desk wasn't top priority.

In our kitchen built into the cabinetry is an area that was created to put a phone, pay bills or use as a work area. I plunked my laptop down there and finished my schooling in the kitchen with the TV going, kids running around, music blaring and every day life going on around me. It wasn't easy really, I require a certain amount of quiet and privacy in order to really study and work. But again buying a desk for my bedroom wasn't top priority, dishes where.

As soon as Stephen got here he bought a small desk and set up his computer partly for work and partly because he is a computer geek who needs several hours a day on the computer in order to not be grouchy. His desk area quickly grew over whelming so one day I moved the desk over and put in a table to hold all his clutter. That didn't last long before I was putting in a bigger table that he now works on but really he needs an ever bigger one ( his current table is big enough to seat 6 people and that really isnt big enough) I have spent the last 3 years stealing time on his computer a little here and a little there. Once I finished school computer time wasn't a necessity for me. Really the only time I got out the laptop was when I went to drills and only then so I could Skype Stephen at night.

Stephen has really tried to be generous with the computer and letting me have time when I ask. but it never takes long before he is standing over my shoulder politely nudging me to "get the hell off his computer" he never says that but I can read him like a book and I know it drove him nuts giving up the computer to me. At times when he stood over my shoulder I commented that I really needed my own desk and work area. He really wants me to do a lot of the photo editing but he can't stand to not be at the computer so he often moves me on so that he can get back to his desk. Any time I mentioned that I needed my own work space he always unhhnned me and went back to his stuff. It wasn't a priority and we really didn't have the space and he really don't mind me using his computer blah blah blah.. I wasn't to bothered because I didn't really get on there that much.

So when I enrolled in school recently I said to Stephen "how are you going to handle it when I start school in two days time and I need hours and hours every day on your computer? How are you gonnna deal with little to know computer access every day? ". His reply was "ummm couldn't you do that on the lap top" I said " I guess but I can't do all that work in the living room or kitchen, I need a desk and the ability to close the door on all of you!" That very day Stephen managed to help me pull out his old desk, move his book shelf to another room and set up a work area for me. I couldn't help but laugh, he was never bothered to help me do all of this because he always knew that if he stood over my shoulder and gently nudged me I would move on and give up the computer, but going back to school meant I wouldn't be able to do that and he would have to relinquish the computer time to me. It is funny to me that threatening his computer time put him into instant action.

I don't think this is just a Stephen thing, I think its more of a man thing, they really have to have a reason to take drastic action. There isn't always this thought about what every one else needs, if it don't affect men directly they seem to block every thing out. Men make me laugh, especially Stephen!

adding my most recent drawing from art class. I have a long way to go but working on it.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

don't look a gift horse in the mouth!

Normally at work I listen to audio books while I work so that people's chattering don't distract me. I love doing this and have a shelf full of books.I have listened to each book at least 3 or 4 times each, and every one there that has books has traded back and forth with me so I have listened to pretty much all the books floating around the office. It is for sure time to visit half price books as soon as possible.

Today instead of re-listening to a book I turned on the radio. It didn't take 2 minutes for me to be mad, this is why books are better! People where calling into this radio station bashing the US forces for not acting quick enough or doing enough for the people in Haiti. Let me say for the record that my favorite part of being in the military is the fact that when disaster strikes I may get to run and help. I was there a few days after Katrina hit New Orleans and I loved it. But it really ruffles my feathers when you try to help and get treated like crap for it!

Like I said I was in New Orleans right after Katrina hit, I didn't see any other countries dropping supplies down to those trapped people! No those trapped people ate the MRE and drank the water that we had in our personal bags to feed us while we where there. We went there knowing that supplies where short so we took as much food and water as we could in order to sustain us (the troops) until supplies where delivered or we went home. Most of the people in the Super Dome had been with out supplies for 5 days when we arrived, most of us took the food and water out of our personal bags and handed it into the crowd for the young and elderly to share.

I saw US forces bring supplies before to many days passed but I never saw any foreign countries hovering over our disaster and dropping supplies to us.

The US has suffered other disasters, tornadoes that destroyed OKC and Dallas, and again we sustained our selves and took care of each other but I don't recall other countries jumping in to help.

Now don't take me wrong I am all for helping but why can't people just be thankful for what help they get instead of complaining that it isn't enough! Why is the responsibility of the US to take care of every country? One of the people that called into the radio station today was complaining that the Haiti people are living outside, hello our country is struggling at the moment we have a lot of people living out side too! And don't they realize that all of your troops that are over there right now are living outside to just so they can help!

Say thank you to some one once in a while instead of complaining that they don't do enough for you!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

school so far


OK huge relief when Monday afternoon rolled around and my class was all set up I discovered that all those books posted out there didn't apply to my class. I only have two books and a lot of reading but not nearly what I thought was posted.

I am actually taking two classes but on Monday there was only one class set up. Today I had a voice mail from my advisor (who I have never spoken to before) telling me that she had my second class set up and I could start attending now. I have yet to get a response from the  advisor or instructor about how this will affect my required attendance or the lateness of the 3 assignments that have already been due. The new class is an art history class and already on day one I am wondering why exactly do I need to know about prehistoric art. Yes it is interesting and I think I will like looking at it and understanding what it all means but why is it important to a photography degree?

The first class is an art class where I actually have to draw stuff, scan it and turn it in so that the entire class can see. The first thing we had to draw (first pic above) was odd. We had to put the paper and pencil to in a position so that we could not see it, and then draw our hand, but with out looking at the paper, we had to draw our hand 3 times, non of mine look the same and all of them look like some little kid drew them. Sara and Shelby burst in and had a look at my drawing and burst out laughing, I was really feeling down about it until I posted mine and wondered through the class looking at all the other student's drawings. Yeah we all drew strange looking pics of our hands.

The second assignment was to do almost the same thing, only this time we had to be holding something in the model hand and we could look but not draw while looking, in other words we could stop take a peek to see if the where heading in the same direction (but don't lift the pencil) then stop looking and start drawing again. Once again I had a less than attractive picture. I just want to start drawing something I am good at, I am back to the idea that I should be blobbing paint on a board and calling it art! But either way the drawing is a bit of fun. I am thinking I better enjoy the art classes because I know that when I get to the photography classes and they start talking fstop and aperture and all those things I will be struggling to keep up.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

starting school

Well I finally enrolled in school to start working on a Bachlor's degree. I am taking the classes on line at The Art Institute. I assumed this would be just like the online classes I took at UOP. I was a little off on my assumptions!. I got my first assignment from my advisor, he emailed it to me and said here it is for Monday you can go ahead and look over it. So I did, this assignment just reaffermed my incorrect ideas that it would be the same. Basically write a little bio, post it, read the other students bios and reply to them. Great just like UOP.

Then I decided to have a look at the rest of the week's assignments. OMG there are 17 books with 2-3 chapters to be read from each book! Ok we had one book per class before and a couple chapters from that book. I am blown away at the amount of reading I have to do and the subjects as well. I enrolled for a Batchlors in Photography, the books are about being a professional sales person, archatector, video game design and web page design. Wow I am in for a lot of long nights!

All I can say is I really want this degree so it is reading time!

I added a photo from a recent wedding, Stephen and I really want to start doing a photo a day but with hawk, work, kids, broken down car and now school I am not sure when I will have time!